Slap that laptop shut, son!
The time for email agg is over. For a week or something like that.
Spain.
Greece.
Your Nan’s.
My Nan’s.
Let’s goooooooooo.
“Because it’s important to remember that time stands still in airports. One minute you’re buying giant Toblerones, the next you’re on your third pint at 5.38am.”
Although to be fair, we’ll lunge at any chance to leg it from the office, to escape grimness like this.
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Not a vibe.
Right, you’re here for hints and tips and ick-avoidance advice, and we’ve got it, by the bucket and spade loads.
Pack = flex
First up, packing your bag
You bringing fire to the beach? Well, you best get your fits lined up and ready to roll. Hot tip: Lock that bad boy up. Tight.
@theasybagg last clip is out of mind 🤬#baggagehandler #airport #luggage ♬ QKThr – Aphex Twin
At the airport
This is it my friends, stage 1 is complete we’ve got bags and we’ve definitely, definitely got passports right? Right?
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Now to the official start line of the holiday: the airport. If you’re flying. Which not everyone is. But you get the point.
Because it’s important to remember that time stands still in airports. One minute you’re buying giant Toblerones, the next you’re on your third pint at 5.38am.
What a wonderful place. Get there early for max fun.
“Just remember: nothing breaks hearts like holiday lurrrrve. You can thank some bronzed God from “near London” or that girl doing the drink promos from Northern Ireland.”
From Friendcation to Baecation
Is one of your crew single and ready to mingle? If so, chances are you could lose a good one. One minute you and them are booking boat parties, necking rainbow-coloured cocktails with fancy names, slagging off your work crush.
Next thing, they’ve vanished, done one. You can thank some bronzed God from “near London” or that girl doing the drink promos from Northern Ireland. They’ve won this one.
Just remember: nothing breaks hearts like holiday lurrrrve. Stay strong when the rain comes.
Coming down and coming home
All good things must end. It can’t go on forever, can it? No Mick, it can’t.
So it’s time to say adios to your cute little beach spot. Hasta luego to the absolute don who turned your 2-for-1s into 3-for-1s. Lovely touch, señor. And no more karaoke by the sea.
You’ll be missed.
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And our hot tips for getting back into civilian life and surviving? We haven’t got any. None. Nada. Maybe a nice massage though? That could help, right?
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